Don't miss Robert Brady's post today, "A handful of Broadays", about being "Absent Minded" as we grow older. His blog "Pureland Mountain" is a delight to read.
click on the above title to visit the blog.
Tell him Chancy sent you :)
"So if you've been enjoying a well-lived life, by the time you reach my age you have a lot of there there. With so many lives in you to live, re-live and be mentally active in, it should be no surprise if you're often in more than one life at a time (especially when in one of them what you're doing has become routine...). So you might as well admit it: you're not absent-minded, you're extra-minded"
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
CNN -- You never know who is listening
I was mixing a meat loaf and halfway listening to President Bush's speech from New Orleans today regarding the one year anniversary of Katrina.I heard what sounded like someone in the audience speaking. Bush paused and looked confused then continued with his prepared remarks.
A few seconds later I heard very clearly a woman's voice saying something like "Well, it is difficult to find someone with true compassion." Then another person responded evidently; and then the first woman said "you know he IS married with 3 children. But his wife is something of a control freak"
I was totally mystified until I Googled "Bush Katrina Speech News" and found the answer I was seeking except I still do not know if there was a heckler or if it was all the open mike confusion
.....................................
I later found this info on the Chicago Tribune:
"A CNN glitch during President Bush's Katrina speech
The live feed of President Bush’s address at a New Orleans high school on the anniversary of Hurricane Katrina was marred by some disconcerting chatter that came over the live CNN feed Tuesday.
At 11:48 a.m. Chicago time, a woman’s voice, presumably that of a CNN staffer, cut in just after Bush spoke this line:
“To make sure that we keep our promises and to make sure this good area recovers, we have got to give assurances to the citizens that if there is another natural disaster we’ll respond in better fashion.”
Just after this statement, Bush’s voice could still be heard, but then a female’s voice was heard having a conversation with another person whose voice was not fully audible. What sounded like an expletive was heard, then the first woman’s voice continued, apparently speaking of a third person’s merits.
“I’m very lucky at the network [not audible], he is genuinely a loving, no-ego [not audible] just a really passionate, compassionate, great, great human being. And they exist, they do exist. They’re hard to find, yep, but they are out there.”
The second woman’s voice is heard in the background, and possibly the sound of something being sprayed, which leads to the conjecture that a CNN correspondent’s microphone perhaps somehow was activated while she was having makeup and hair done. The subject then apparently turns to family.
“Mom’s got a good vibe. Brothers have to be, you know, protective. Except for mine, I’ve got to be protective of him. Ah yeah, I have to be protective of him. He’s married, three kids, but his wife is just a control freak.”
Soon after that, the the unknown woman’s audio was cut off, and CNN anchor voice Daryn Kagan could be heard over the speech, saying, “All right, we’ve been listening in to President Bush as he speaks in New Orleans today.”
A CNN spokeswoman said she would try to find out whose voice it was that accidentally came over the airwaves.
UPDATE: At 12:43 p.m. Chicago time, CNN anchor Kyra Phillips apologized for "an issue we had" with microphones during Bush's speech."
-----------
Oh well, this open mike bit was the only thing interesting in an otherwise classic Bush dullsville speech
Too Funny!!!!!
Here is a funny comment from Youtube
"The most important thing to hear is where she calls her sister-in-law a "control freak." Someone's got some 'splainin' to do."
A few seconds later I heard very clearly a woman's voice saying something like "Well, it is difficult to find someone with true compassion." Then another person responded evidently; and then the first woman said "you know he IS married with 3 children. But his wife is something of a control freak"
I was totally mystified until I Googled "Bush Katrina Speech News" and found the answer I was seeking except I still do not know if there was a heckler or if it was all the open mike confusion
.....................................
I later found this info on the Chicago Tribune:
"A CNN glitch during President Bush's Katrina speech
The live feed of President Bush’s address at a New Orleans high school on the anniversary of Hurricane Katrina was marred by some disconcerting chatter that came over the live CNN feed Tuesday.
At 11:48 a.m. Chicago time, a woman’s voice, presumably that of a CNN staffer, cut in just after Bush spoke this line:
“To make sure that we keep our promises and to make sure this good area recovers, we have got to give assurances to the citizens that if there is another natural disaster we’ll respond in better fashion.”
Just after this statement, Bush’s voice could still be heard, but then a female’s voice was heard having a conversation with another person whose voice was not fully audible. What sounded like an expletive was heard, then the first woman’s voice continued, apparently speaking of a third person’s merits.
“I’m very lucky at the network [not audible], he is genuinely a loving, no-ego [not audible] just a really passionate, compassionate, great, great human being. And they exist, they do exist. They’re hard to find, yep, but they are out there.”
The second woman’s voice is heard in the background, and possibly the sound of something being sprayed, which leads to the conjecture that a CNN correspondent’s microphone perhaps somehow was activated while she was having makeup and hair done. The subject then apparently turns to family.
“Mom’s got a good vibe. Brothers have to be, you know, protective. Except for mine, I’ve got to be protective of him. Ah yeah, I have to be protective of him. He’s married, three kids, but his wife is just a control freak.”
Soon after that, the the unknown woman’s audio was cut off, and CNN anchor voice Daryn Kagan could be heard over the speech, saying, “All right, we’ve been listening in to President Bush as he speaks in New Orleans today.”
A CNN spokeswoman said she would try to find out whose voice it was that accidentally came over the airwaves.
UPDATE: At 12:43 p.m. Chicago time, CNN anchor Kyra Phillips apologized for "an issue we had" with microphones during Bush's speech."
-----------
Oh well, this open mike bit was the only thing interesting in an otherwise classic Bush dullsville speech
Too Funny!!!!!
Here is a funny comment from Youtube
"The most important thing to hear is where she calls her sister-in-law a "control freak." Someone's got some 'splainin' to do."
Sunday, August 27, 2006
Healing chant
I read this prayer on another blog and even though I am Christian and the chant is in the Buddhist tradition it struck a cord within me.
---------------
Traditional Blessing and Healing Chant
"Just as the soft rains fill the streams,
pour into the rivers, and join together in the oceans,
so may the power of every moment of your goodness
flow forth to awaken and heal all beings--
those here now, those gone before, those yet to come.
By the power of every moment of your goodness,
may your heart's wishes be soon fulfilled
as completely shining as the bright full moon,
as magically as by a wish-fulfilling gem.
By the power of every moment of your goodness,
may all dangers be averted and all disease be gone.
May no obstacle come across your way.
May you enjoy fulfillment and long life.
For all in whose heart dwells respect,
who follow the wisdom and compassion, of the Way,
may your life prosper in the four blessings
of old age, beauty, happiness and strength."
Source: Holistic Living
Visit www.beliefnet.com for a source of spirituality for any religious persuasion.
click on title on the header for link
---------------
Traditional Blessing and Healing Chant
"Just as the soft rains fill the streams,
pour into the rivers, and join together in the oceans,
so may the power of every moment of your goodness
flow forth to awaken and heal all beings--
those here now, those gone before, those yet to come.
By the power of every moment of your goodness,
may your heart's wishes be soon fulfilled
as completely shining as the bright full moon,
as magically as by a wish-fulfilling gem.
By the power of every moment of your goodness,
may all dangers be averted and all disease be gone.
May no obstacle come across your way.
May you enjoy fulfillment and long life.
For all in whose heart dwells respect,
who follow the wisdom and compassion, of the Way,
may your life prosper in the four blessings
of old age, beauty, happiness and strength."
Source: Holistic Living
Visit www.beliefnet.com for a source of spirituality for any religious persuasion.
click on title on the header for link
Friday, August 25, 2006
September 11, 2001
"NEW YORK - CNN will mark the fifth anniversary of the Sept. 11 attacks by replaying on the Internet the cable network's coverage of that day's events.
Viewers can watch how events unfolded starting at 8:30 a.m., minutes before the first reports of an airplane hitting the World Trade Center. The feed will run in real time, as the network showed it five years ago, until midnight"
---------------------------------
I got a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach when I read this announcement a few minutes ago. . At least CNN is not preempting their TV coverage to show films of the carnage of 9/11. That would be too much to bear.
On September 11, 2001, my husband and I were sitting in our breakfast nook talking and the phone rang. It was our daughter calling to tell us "Quick. Turn on CNN. A plane just flew into one of the World Trade Center buildings." We rushed to the TV just in time to see the second plane hit. Even now, five years later, I feel numb and scared thinking about that day. The Pentagon hit. Flight 93 crashes.
All so unreal. We could not bring ourselves to stray far from the TV even as the images become more filled with the horror of the poor people jumping from the buildings. And the dazed and shocked survivors running from the scene.
. .
I know we need to remember these terrible events but I dread the coming anniversary week surrounding September 11. The psyche of our nation has been strained. We need solace and comfort. Watching reruns of 9/11 will not comfort us. I, myself, could use a good fireside chat by FDR reassuring us that all will be well and that "We have nothing to fear but fear itself"
Where were you on 9/11?
Viewers can watch how events unfolded starting at 8:30 a.m., minutes before the first reports of an airplane hitting the World Trade Center. The feed will run in real time, as the network showed it five years ago, until midnight"
---------------------------------
I got a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach when I read this announcement a few minutes ago. . At least CNN is not preempting their TV coverage to show films of the carnage of 9/11. That would be too much to bear.
On September 11, 2001, my husband and I were sitting in our breakfast nook talking and the phone rang. It was our daughter calling to tell us "Quick. Turn on CNN. A plane just flew into one of the World Trade Center buildings." We rushed to the TV just in time to see the second plane hit. Even now, five years later, I feel numb and scared thinking about that day. The Pentagon hit. Flight 93 crashes.
All so unreal. We could not bring ourselves to stray far from the TV even as the images become more filled with the horror of the poor people jumping from the buildings. And the dazed and shocked survivors running from the scene.
. .
I know we need to remember these terrible events but I dread the coming anniversary week surrounding September 11. The psyche of our nation has been strained. We need solace and comfort. Watching reruns of 9/11 will not comfort us. I, myself, could use a good fireside chat by FDR reassuring us that all will be well and that "We have nothing to fear but fear itself"
Where were you on 9/11?
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Staying the course
Octogenarian has a post on his web site that prodded me to go googling about Iraq. Click on the link(title) above and you can visit Mort (Octogenarian). Mort is a retired journalist and his blog is filled with thought provoking information and posts. Tell him Chancy sent you
http://octogenarian.blogspot.com/
------
Top 10 Bad Reasons for “Staying the Course” in Iraq
(and One Good One)
by Jeff Huber
03 October 2005
"10. Democracy takes time. America needed 13 years to write its Constitution.
The American Revolution analogy is ludicrous. Britain did not invade the American colonies in order to liberate us, and we did not ask them to stick around for more than a decade to help us form our government.
9. If we leave now, we’ll embolden the terrorists.
They’re not exactly shrinking violets now. The longer we’ve stayed, the bolder they’ve become.
8. Withdrawing will show lack of American resolve.
Getting in a bar fight over a girl shows resolve. Waking up in jail with your nose broken shows how stupid you are.
7. We’re fighting them there so we don’t have to fight them here.
If we don’t have to fight them over here, why do we spend around $40 billion a year for a Department of Homeland Security?
6. The spread of democracy in the Middle East will enhance America’s security.
"Free" elections in the Middle East have helped Afghanistan become the world’s leading exporter of narcotics and transformed terrorist groups like Hamas and Hezbollah into "legitimate" political parties.
5. We need to support our troops.
I applaud and deeply respect our men and women in uniform for their magnificent service and sacrifice. These are my people, remember? However, comma….
In the first place, we are supporting our troops — to the tune of nearly half a trillion dollars a year.
Second, when we continue to commit those men and women in uniform to a struggle for which there is no military solution, we are abusing them, not supporting them.
Third — and most importantly — America does not exist for the purpose of supporting its military. Our military exists to support America. And if it’s not defending us at home or achieving our national aims overseas, it’s not supporting our country.
4. If we pull out now, we’ll look weak.
We’ve committed our national power to an ill-advised war and are losing. How much weaker can we look?
3. In times of crisis, we need to rally around the president and his policies.
America will not maintain or restore its power and prestige by behaving like a nation of lemmings. There is nothing noble, brave, or patriotic about following the leader over the cliff and into the sea.
2. "They tried to kill my dad."
Thanks to Mr. Bush’s policies and strategies, they’ve succeeded in killing a lot of dads, and moms, and aunts, and uncles, and brothers, and sisters ….
If we cut through the bunker mentality and frame the argument for staying in Iraq to reflect the neocons’ real purpose for the Iraq invasion, it might sound something like this:
1. We set out to establish a military base of operations from which we can control the Middle East and its oil, and we should persist until we "get the job done."
Even though it’s true, the argument’s still specious. Our "besttrained, bestequipped, bestfunded" military can’t get Iraq or Afghanistan under control. How can we possibly expect to lock down the entire Middle East?
+1. We owe something to the Iraqi people.
This is the only rationale that still holds water with me. We need to pay for the pottery we broke. But how much do we need to pay for it, and who exactly is this we we’re referring to, kemosabe"
www.epluribusmedia.org/columns
http://octogenarian.blogspot.com/
------
Top 10 Bad Reasons for “Staying the Course” in Iraq
(and One Good One)
by Jeff Huber
03 October 2005
"10. Democracy takes time. America needed 13 years to write its Constitution.
The American Revolution analogy is ludicrous. Britain did not invade the American colonies in order to liberate us, and we did not ask them to stick around for more than a decade to help us form our government.
9. If we leave now, we’ll embolden the terrorists.
They’re not exactly shrinking violets now. The longer we’ve stayed, the bolder they’ve become.
8. Withdrawing will show lack of American resolve.
Getting in a bar fight over a girl shows resolve. Waking up in jail with your nose broken shows how stupid you are.
7. We’re fighting them there so we don’t have to fight them here.
If we don’t have to fight them over here, why do we spend around $40 billion a year for a Department of Homeland Security?
6. The spread of democracy in the Middle East will enhance America’s security.
"Free" elections in the Middle East have helped Afghanistan become the world’s leading exporter of narcotics and transformed terrorist groups like Hamas and Hezbollah into "legitimate" political parties.
5. We need to support our troops.
I applaud and deeply respect our men and women in uniform for their magnificent service and sacrifice. These are my people, remember? However, comma….
In the first place, we are supporting our troops — to the tune of nearly half a trillion dollars a year.
Second, when we continue to commit those men and women in uniform to a struggle for which there is no military solution, we are abusing them, not supporting them.
Third — and most importantly — America does not exist for the purpose of supporting its military. Our military exists to support America. And if it’s not defending us at home or achieving our national aims overseas, it’s not supporting our country.
4. If we pull out now, we’ll look weak.
We’ve committed our national power to an ill-advised war and are losing. How much weaker can we look?
3. In times of crisis, we need to rally around the president and his policies.
America will not maintain or restore its power and prestige by behaving like a nation of lemmings. There is nothing noble, brave, or patriotic about following the leader over the cliff and into the sea.
2. "They tried to kill my dad."
Thanks to Mr. Bush’s policies and strategies, they’ve succeeded in killing a lot of dads, and moms, and aunts, and uncles, and brothers, and sisters ….
If we cut through the bunker mentality and frame the argument for staying in Iraq to reflect the neocons’ real purpose for the Iraq invasion, it might sound something like this:
1. We set out to establish a military base of operations from which we can control the Middle East and its oil, and we should persist until we "get the job done."
Even though it’s true, the argument’s still specious. Our "besttrained, bestequipped, bestfunded" military can’t get Iraq or Afghanistan under control. How can we possibly expect to lock down the entire Middle East?
+1. We owe something to the Iraqi people.
This is the only rationale that still holds water with me. We need to pay for the pottery we broke. But how much do we need to pay for it, and who exactly is this we we’re referring to, kemosabe"
www.epluribusmedia.org/columns
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Go visit
Roger at "There's Always Something" See URL above in link. Roger is a retired minister and he is learning how to video blog. This is his second one and it is very good. He sings "All The Way" in a laid back style between Tony Bennett and "Ole Blue Eyes.
Tell him Chancy sent you...:)
PS My hubby has an excellent voice and so does our son so you can tell I am a sucker for a man who can sing...:)
Tell him Chancy sent you...:)
PS My hubby has an excellent voice and so does our son so you can tell I am a sucker for a man who can sing...:)
Friday, August 18, 2006
Comfort Food
What are your comfort foods that you remember from your childhood? Cinnamon toast, banana pudding,sweet potato pie, chicken and dumplings, beef pot roast with sweet potatoes and; don't laugh, fruit cake. Those are some of mine.
My mother used to make the best fruitcake. Lots of pecans and candied fruit. She would soak a clean cloth in whiskey or rum and wrap the cake and leave it for a week or so. I know many people hate fruitcake but hers was very tasty. I have never been able to duplicate it.
And also I was just thinking the other day how much I missed having banana pudding. I told Mr C. that I was going to make a banana pudding for supper one day soon. That's all. We could just eat the pudding and call it supper.
Yummy.
My mother used to make the best fruitcake. Lots of pecans and candied fruit. She would soak a clean cloth in whiskey or rum and wrap the cake and leave it for a week or so. I know many people hate fruitcake but hers was very tasty. I have never been able to duplicate it.
And also I was just thinking the other day how much I missed having banana pudding. I told Mr C. that I was going to make a banana pudding for supper one day soon. That's all. We could just eat the pudding and call it supper.
Yummy.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
The King died
"August 16
1977: in 1977 THE KING, ELVIS (AARON) PRESLEY died at his mansion Graceland from heart failure, probably brought on by drug abuse."
Can you believe it has been almost 30 years since Elvis died? I can't. I was not a super fan of Elvis. I suppose I was past the age where his music spoke to me. However, I have come to appreciate and love his gospel recordings. Man oh man, he could really sing gospel; especially "Amazing Grace", one of my favorites. ***
I do remember his appearance on Ed Sullivan. The grainy black and white picture that Ed censored by only showing Elvis dancing(gyrating) from the waist up.
---------------------------------------------
"Presley's first No 1 hit, Heartbreak Hotel, came out in January 1956, and his first album, also a chart topper, was released in March. As his fame grew, so did the vigour of his critics, who saw Presley as an over-sexed enchanter leading American teenagers to ruin.
But when Sullivan praised him as a "decent, fine boy" much of the storm began to subside. The praise came at the end of Presley's final show on January 6, 1957, when he was shown from the waist up only."
----------------------------------------------
What sweet simple times compared to now when anything goes in movies and on TV.
***"Amazing grace, oh how sweet the sound
That saved a wreck like me
I once was lost, though now I'm found
I was blind, but now I see
1977: in 1977 THE KING, ELVIS (AARON) PRESLEY died at his mansion Graceland from heart failure, probably brought on by drug abuse."
Can you believe it has been almost 30 years since Elvis died? I can't. I was not a super fan of Elvis. I suppose I was past the age where his music spoke to me. However, I have come to appreciate and love his gospel recordings. Man oh man, he could really sing gospel; especially "Amazing Grace", one of my favorites. ***
I do remember his appearance on Ed Sullivan. The grainy black and white picture that Ed censored by only showing Elvis dancing(gyrating) from the waist up.
---------------------------------------------
"Presley's first No 1 hit, Heartbreak Hotel, came out in January 1956, and his first album, also a chart topper, was released in March. As his fame grew, so did the vigour of his critics, who saw Presley as an over-sexed enchanter leading American teenagers to ruin.
But when Sullivan praised him as a "decent, fine boy" much of the storm began to subside. The praise came at the end of Presley's final show on January 6, 1957, when he was shown from the waist up only."
----------------------------------------------
What sweet simple times compared to now when anything goes in movies and on TV.
***"Amazing grace, oh how sweet the sound
That saved a wreck like me
I once was lost, though now I'm found
I was blind, but now I see
Memories
I was thinking recently about the war years during the early 1940's.
Living in a small college town in Georgia we were in no real danger and never felt afraid. You have to know that back then we were not as mobile a society as we are now. If we traveled it was usually either in the car or on a bus. Airplane travel was not an ordinary occurrence as it is now.
People on both the west and east coast of the US were more aware of the threats from the enemy. In small inland towns we felt safe.I was 12 years old when the war started and 16 when it finally ended.
My three brothers were drafted. One saw overseas duty in Northern Africa with Signal Corps and one served in England, the Netherlands and later Germany. The third had "tough" duty in the Navy in Hollywood, Florida and then he was sent to Seattle, Washington in preparation to being shipped overseas when the war ended. They all three came home safely.
On the home front we went about our lives in a normal fashion but always concerned about those close to us who were away in the service.
A brief rundown of war time memories:
Ration Books, air raid wardens, saving foil from gum, High School volunteers picking cotton, V.E. mail, gas rationing,and rationing of sugar, coffee, News reels of the war at the picture shows, one pair of shoes, no silk stockings, painted stockings with seam drawn on back of legs. VE day, VJ day .Polio, March of Dimes, fear of polio infection from swimming pool and water fountains. . We had blackout curtains, air raid sirens,neighborhood air raid warden, war bonds. .
My brother mailed me a silk parachute from Germany,brightly painted wooden souvenir shoes from the Netherlands, English Lavender soap from London.
FDR fireside chats, Churchill, December 7 1941. VE day FDR death, VJ day, DDay I wore bobby socks and saddle oxfords, the songs "Bluebirds Over The White Cliffs of Dover", "Nightingale Sang In Barclay Square."
What are some of your memories from this era?
Living in a small college town in Georgia we were in no real danger and never felt afraid. You have to know that back then we were not as mobile a society as we are now. If we traveled it was usually either in the car or on a bus. Airplane travel was not an ordinary occurrence as it is now.
People on both the west and east coast of the US were more aware of the threats from the enemy. In small inland towns we felt safe.I was 12 years old when the war started and 16 when it finally ended.
My three brothers were drafted. One saw overseas duty in Northern Africa with Signal Corps and one served in England, the Netherlands and later Germany. The third had "tough" duty in the Navy in Hollywood, Florida and then he was sent to Seattle, Washington in preparation to being shipped overseas when the war ended. They all three came home safely.
On the home front we went about our lives in a normal fashion but always concerned about those close to us who were away in the service.
A brief rundown of war time memories:
Ration Books, air raid wardens, saving foil from gum, High School volunteers picking cotton, V.E. mail, gas rationing,and rationing of sugar, coffee, News reels of the war at the picture shows, one pair of shoes, no silk stockings, painted stockings with seam drawn on back of legs. VE day, VJ day .Polio, March of Dimes, fear of polio infection from swimming pool and water fountains. . We had blackout curtains, air raid sirens,neighborhood air raid warden, war bonds. .
My brother mailed me a silk parachute from Germany,brightly painted wooden souvenir shoes from the Netherlands, English Lavender soap from London.
FDR fireside chats, Churchill, December 7 1941. VE day FDR death, VJ day, DDay I wore bobby socks and saddle oxfords, the songs "Bluebirds Over The White Cliffs of Dover", "Nightingale Sang In Barclay Square."
What are some of your memories from this era?
Monday, August 14, 2006
Blog highlights for today
Blog Highlights
Don't miss "Maya's Granny" blog post today on aging children.
Tabor's "One Day At a Time" covers her grandchild's first visit to her new house.
Joy's "Joy of Six" has a lovely poem about "Angels"
Ronni at "Time Goes By" has a one act play about her deck garden plants.
Many, many more but these are just the highlights that caught my attention today.
What blog post spoke to you today?
PS: I had missed Judy's post earlier. It is the second one down on her blog and it is called "No Left Turns" It is great and not to be missed.
http://justaskjudy.blogspot.com/
http://joyofsix.typepad.com/joyofsix/
http://tabordays.blogspot.com/
http://mayagranny.blogspot.com/
http://www.timegoesby.net/
Don't miss "Maya's Granny" blog post today on aging children.
Tabor's "One Day At a Time" covers her grandchild's first visit to her new house.
Joy's "Joy of Six" has a lovely poem about "Angels"
Ronni at "Time Goes By" has a one act play about her deck garden plants.
Many, many more but these are just the highlights that caught my attention today.
What blog post spoke to you today?
PS: I had missed Judy's post earlier. It is the second one down on her blog and it is called "No Left Turns" It is great and not to be missed.
http://justaskjudy.blogspot.com/
http://joyofsix.typepad.com/joyofsix/
http://tabordays.blogspot.com/
http://mayagranny.blogspot.com/
http://www.timegoesby.net/
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
Senator Ted Stevens Internet tubes or Intertubes
Tangled up in tubes from Boston.com
July 20, 2006
"Watch your back, Nelly Furtado. An 82-year-old US senator from Alaska is looking for a cut of your dance - floor action this summer -- and his secret weapon is tubes, a series of tubes.
During a Senate Commerce Committee debate on June 28, Senator Ted Stevens described the inner workings of the Internet as ``a series of tubes." To help mouthy tadpoles such as the Google guys understand how the Internet tubes work, Stevens went on to explain that ``those tubes can be filled. And if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material."
The snickering began almost immediately, made worse by another Stevens gaffe: ``An Internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday; I just got it yesterday . . . because it got tangled up." Those blasted, tangly tubes."
-----------------------------------------
and then this from
From Blaugh.com
"To better demonstrate the theory of how information travels online, Senator Ted Stevens has teamed up with research scientists from Helsinki to develop a series of InterTubes - the world’s first Internet data floatation devices.
When submerged in ethernet liquid, InterTubes will carry passengers safely across any type of digital divide. Stevens is quite proud of his invention, claiming that they took “enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material” to complete. With this new system, the young Senator hopes that your personal internets will no longer be delayed.
Stevens also claims that his InterTubes will be delivered on “big trucks” in time for the 2006 holiday shopping season. Net profits are projected to be in the gigabit range - should analysts remain neutral.
Next up for the Stevens development team: an Internet Cerfboard."
Source: TedStevensInterTubes.com
Domain: InternetTubeTruck.com
July 20, 2006
"Watch your back, Nelly Furtado. An 82-year-old US senator from Alaska is looking for a cut of your dance - floor action this summer -- and his secret weapon is tubes, a series of tubes.
During a Senate Commerce Committee debate on June 28, Senator Ted Stevens described the inner workings of the Internet as ``a series of tubes." To help mouthy tadpoles such as the Google guys understand how the Internet tubes work, Stevens went on to explain that ``those tubes can be filled. And if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material."
The snickering began almost immediately, made worse by another Stevens gaffe: ``An Internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday; I just got it yesterday . . . because it got tangled up." Those blasted, tangly tubes."
-----------------------------------------
and then this from
From Blaugh.com
"To better demonstrate the theory of how information travels online, Senator Ted Stevens has teamed up with research scientists from Helsinki to develop a series of InterTubes - the world’s first Internet data floatation devices.
When submerged in ethernet liquid, InterTubes will carry passengers safely across any type of digital divide. Stevens is quite proud of his invention, claiming that they took “enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material” to complete. With this new system, the young Senator hopes that your personal internets will no longer be delayed.
Stevens also claims that his InterTubes will be delivered on “big trucks” in time for the 2006 holiday shopping season. Net profits are projected to be in the gigabit range - should analysts remain neutral.
Next up for the Stevens development team: an Internet Cerfboard."
Source: TedStevensInterTubes.com
Domain: InternetTubeTruck.com
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Some funnies for you.
A friend sent me these. A laugh is good to take our minds off the summer heat and other maladies
************************
My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He
asked me how old I was, and I told him, "62." He was quiet for a moment, and
then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"
***************************
After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old
slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the
children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At
last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting
them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the
three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"
**************************************************
A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what he r own
childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made
from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We
picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking
this in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"
*********************************************
My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know
how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No,
how is we alike?" "You're both old," he replied.
**********************************************
A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word
processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he
asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."
***** *************************************************
I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I
decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was.
She would tell me, and always she was correct. But it was fun for me, so I
continued. At last she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think
you should try to figure out some of these yourself!"
***********************************************
When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the
lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects.
Still, a few fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy
whispered, "It's no use, Grandpa. The mosquitoes are coming after us with
flashlights."
*******************************
When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not
sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandma," he advised. "Mine says I'm four
to six."
*************************************
A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother,
"Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The grandmother,
more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting,"
she said, "How do you make babies?" "It's simple," replied the girl. "You
just change 'y' to 'I and add 'es'"
***********************************************
Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a
teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant."
The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what p regnant
means?" she asked. Sure," said the young boy confidently. "It means carrying
a child."
********************************************
A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids
home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the
fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's
duties. They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster. "No, said
another, "he's just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to a
close. "They use the dogs", she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."
--------------------------------------------------
************************
My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He
asked me how old I was, and I told him, "62." He was quiet for a moment, and
then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"
***************************
After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old
slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the
children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At
last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting
them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the
three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"
**************************************************
A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what he r own
childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made
from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We
picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking
this in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"
*********************************************
My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know
how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No,
how is we alike?" "You're both old," he replied.
**********************************************
A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word
processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he
asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."
***** *************************************************
I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I
decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was.
She would tell me, and always she was correct. But it was fun for me, so I
continued. At last she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think
you should try to figure out some of these yourself!"
***********************************************
When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the
lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects.
Still, a few fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy
whispered, "It's no use, Grandpa. The mosquitoes are coming after us with
flashlights."
*******************************
When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not
sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandma," he advised. "Mine says I'm four
to six."
*************************************
A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother,
"Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The grandmother,
more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting,"
she said, "How do you make babies?" "It's simple," replied the girl. "You
just change 'y' to 'I and add 'es'"
***********************************************
Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a
teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant."
The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what p regnant
means?" she asked. Sure," said the young boy confidently. "It means carrying
a child."
********************************************
A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids
home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the
fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's
duties. They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster. "No, said
another, "he's just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to a
close. "They use the dogs", she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."
--------------------------------------------------
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
The Ice Man Cometh
THE ICE BOX.
I remember when we had an ice box. Not a refrigerator but a white wooden cabinet with a big block of ice in the top .There was a drip pan underneath to hold the water run off as the ice melted.
A separate door closed the ice off from the compartment below where the milk, eggs and butter were kept cool.
The ice truck arriving on our street was a big occasion for all the children. The big burly, well muscled iceman would chip off slivers of ice for us as we waited patiently in the street barefoot with the hot pavement stinging but not burning our feet which were toughened by many summers going barefoot.
Then the iceman would take his black tongs and hoist up a huge block of ice and take it into the kitchen of the house he was servicing, place it in the ice box and then continue his rounds and the excitement of the day was over.
Link
I remember when we had an ice box. Not a refrigerator but a white wooden cabinet with a big block of ice in the top .There was a drip pan underneath to hold the water run off as the ice melted.
A separate door closed the ice off from the compartment below where the milk, eggs and butter were kept cool.
The ice truck arriving on our street was a big occasion for all the children. The big burly, well muscled iceman would chip off slivers of ice for us as we waited patiently in the street barefoot with the hot pavement stinging but not burning our feet which were toughened by many summers going barefoot.
Then the iceman would take his black tongs and hoist up a huge block of ice and take it into the kitchen of the house he was servicing, place it in the ice box and then continue his rounds and the excitement of the day was over.
Link
Dirty rotten scoundrels
It was the 1930's and the medium sized college town of 25,000 people where I lived, had 3 movie theaters. They were the Palace, the Strand, and the Georgian. The Palace was decidedly upscale while the Strand was sometimes referred to as the “rat hole” . The Georgian was somewhere in between.
Saturdays I was allowed to walk to town to the picture show with my best friend Catherine and her big brother, Dick. We were given 10 cents each by our parents.This was the admission price for children over 5. Catherine and I were both 6 years old.
Catherine’s brother Dick was about 10 and he had big ideas. He took us to Woolworth’s Five and Dime Store and Catherine and I, with Dick’s help, spent our picture show money on candy. Back then 20 cents could buy an abundance of penny candy.
Then Dick proceeded to take us to the Strand box office and when they asked how old Catherine and I were, he would answer “They are both five.”
We got in free.
We sat in the darkened theater watching Hopalong Cassidy or Gene Autry ride the canyons of the wild west and dodge the Indians. Then the continuing serial with Buck Rogers exploring space would come on and we would catch up on last week’s cliff hanger when Buck and company were left hanging in some sort of bad trouble.
All the while during the movie we were gouging ourselves on our ill gotten gain of candy, candy, candy. I would leave the picture show each time with a bad headache never realizing I had a sugar overload. Perhaps my conscience was bothering me also. After all, Catherine and I were willing but silent accomplices in the candy caper.
Soon the day arrived when Dick could no longer palm us off as 5 year olds and the caper ended.
We had to pony up the whole dime to get in the picture show and our halcyon days of candy. candy. candy were over.
Saturdays I was allowed to walk to town to the picture show with my best friend Catherine and her big brother, Dick. We were given 10 cents each by our parents.This was the admission price for children over 5. Catherine and I were both 6 years old.
Catherine’s brother Dick was about 10 and he had big ideas. He took us to Woolworth’s Five and Dime Store and Catherine and I, with Dick’s help, spent our picture show money on candy. Back then 20 cents could buy an abundance of penny candy.
Then Dick proceeded to take us to the Strand box office and when they asked how old Catherine and I were, he would answer “They are both five.”
We got in free.
We sat in the darkened theater watching Hopalong Cassidy or Gene Autry ride the canyons of the wild west and dodge the Indians. Then the continuing serial with Buck Rogers exploring space would come on and we would catch up on last week’s cliff hanger when Buck and company were left hanging in some sort of bad trouble.
All the while during the movie we were gouging ourselves on our ill gotten gain of candy, candy, candy. I would leave the picture show each time with a bad headache never realizing I had a sugar overload. Perhaps my conscience was bothering me also. After all, Catherine and I were willing but silent accomplices in the candy caper.
Soon the day arrived when Dick could no longer palm us off as 5 year olds and the caper ended.
We had to pony up the whole dime to get in the picture show and our halcyon days of candy. candy. candy were over.
Saturday, July 29, 2006
Dry weather, dry skin
During this heat and drought we have been experiencing this summer
I got to thinking about the products I use to stay moisturized. Of course on important ingredient is the 8 glasses of water we are supposed to drink that hydrate our bodies and skin. I learned an important lesson about the value of adequate water consumption during my recent illness when even my lips and mouth were all dried up.
Here are some products I really like and use every day, all year long:
CETAPHIL skin cleanser. Wonderful cleanser. Removes make up. Cleans face. Either leave on or rinse. Either way leaves skin feeling smooth and soft.
EUCERIN facial moisturizer with SPF 30. A good product which I use every morning after my shower. Sunblock is so important..( Neutrogena also has a similar product that I use sometime too.
BURTS BEES nail moisturizer..feels great on nails and has a yummy lemony scent.
BLISTEX DAILY CONDITIONING TREATMENT for dry lips.(SPF 20) Helps lips retain moisture and feels yummy.
VASELINE INTENSIVE CARE TOTAL MOISTURE LOTION for hands, face, feet or anywhere. a good bargain product.
What are your favorites? Any suggestions for extremely dry hair?
Do you have any favorites to add to this list?
I got to thinking about the products I use to stay moisturized. Of course on important ingredient is the 8 glasses of water we are supposed to drink that hydrate our bodies and skin. I learned an important lesson about the value of adequate water consumption during my recent illness when even my lips and mouth were all dried up.
Here are some products I really like and use every day, all year long:
CETAPHIL skin cleanser. Wonderful cleanser. Removes make up. Cleans face. Either leave on or rinse. Either way leaves skin feeling smooth and soft.
EUCERIN facial moisturizer with SPF 30. A good product which I use every morning after my shower. Sunblock is so important..( Neutrogena also has a similar product that I use sometime too.
BURTS BEES nail moisturizer..feels great on nails and has a yummy lemony scent.
BLISTEX DAILY CONDITIONING TREATMENT for dry lips.(SPF 20) Helps lips retain moisture and feels yummy.
VASELINE INTENSIVE CARE TOTAL MOISTURE LOTION for hands, face, feet or anywhere. a good bargain product.
What are your favorites? Any suggestions for extremely dry hair?
Do you have any favorites to add to this list?
Friday, July 28, 2006
Maya's Granny
Thursday, July 27, 2006
The Great El Paso Piss Off of 1955
I don't usually recommend another blogger's post but you must go and read Maya's Granny's post of Thursday July 27, 2006.
She has captured in a brilliant word picture the angst and humor of a 13 year old girl(herself) who did not want to grow into a woman.
Click on the link above at Maya's Granny
The Great El Paso Piss Off of 1955
I don't usually recommend another blogger's post but you must go and read Maya's Granny's post of Thursday July 27, 2006.
She has captured in a brilliant word picture the angst and humor of a 13 year old girl(herself) who did not want to grow into a woman.
Click on the link above at Maya's Granny
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
The doctor is in the house.
The patient is better; not all the way there but on the road to recovery. The doctor made a second house call today and diagnosed a temperature control problem which he proceeded to alleviate with some machinations and a hefty bill. He said all should be well and back to normal in about 24 hours. Patient is already getting cooler and humming right along, happy to have the worst over with. The bill was $395.00, none of which is covered by Medicare but sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures.
Then the Appliance Doctor sat down and told us about his lunch hour which he spent eating a Granola Bar and fishing off a bank on the nearby Chattahoochee River. He said it relaxes him to fish instead of running to a fast food place and gulping a burger.
When he left the ice maker dumped its first load of ice. So recovery is assured.
Oh.
As for me, I am much better and eating and swallowing and kicking ass so I must be on the road to recovery also.
Then the Appliance Doctor sat down and told us about his lunch hour which he spent eating a Granola Bar and fishing off a bank on the nearby Chattahoochee River. He said it relaxes him to fish instead of running to a fast food place and gulping a burger.
When he left the ice maker dumped its first load of ice. So recovery is assured.
Oh.
As for me, I am much better and eating and swallowing and kicking ass so I must be on the road to recovery also.
Thursday, July 20, 2006
Cool, clear water
Remember those Saturdays when Roy or Gene or Hopalong would gallop across the screen dodging Indians, rescuing the girl,saving the homestead, and searching for cool, clear water?
Sons of the Pioneers- Roy Rogers
Cool Water
by Bob Nolan (Revised lyrics by Joni Mitchell)
All day I face the barren waste
Without a taste of water
Cool water
Old Dan and I
Our throats slate dry
Our spirits cry out for water
Cool clear water
Keep on movin' Dan
Some devils had a plan
Buried poison in the sand
Don't drink it man
It's in the water
Cool clear water
In my mind I see
A big green tree
And a river flowin' free
Waitin' up ahead
For you and me
Cool clear water
The nights are cool and I'm a fool
Each star is a pool of water
Cool water
But come the dawn
We carry on
We won't last long without water
Cool clear water
Keep on movin' Dan
We're still in no-man's land
Dry bones and sand
People never planned here for water
Cool clear water
In my mind I see
A big green tree
And a river flowin' free
Waiting up ahead for you and me
Cool clear water
The shadows sway
They seem to say
Tonight we pray for water
Cool water
And way up there
If you care
Please show us where
There's good water
Cool clear water.
OK, Now I am feeling well enough to tell you all how sick I have been.
Last Saturday at this time I would have given "my kingdom" for a drink of cool clear water. I was parched and dehydrated. Could not swallow even a sip of water without terrible pain; and I have a high pain thresh hold but with the awful sore throat I came down with on Friday, swallowing anything was out of the picture.(even my saliva)
I called my doctor late Friday afternoon and he sent me an antibiotic, large pill, which I had to force myself to swallow regardless of the severe pain. By Monday I was no better. Mr C took me in to the doctor who said my throat looked like a bad burn. That is exactly how it felt. He diagnosed bronchitis and severely inflamed throat and the nurse proceed to give me a shot in each hip to speed up healing process. He also prescribed a liquid throat anesthetizing medicine.
So I now can swallow, and eat light stuff like scrambled eggs and Gatorade and ginger ale.
But it is mainly the cool clear water that I appreciate the most. Most times with a little crushed ice in the water. The crushed ice comes from the water/ice dispenser on refrigerator door. Ahhh
So last night I have had a pleasant restful evening. I go upstairs and get ready for bed. I go back down to the kitchen for water and --------
WHAMO !!!
The &&%###&& refrigerator has chosen this night to go off. The water is leaking out of the freezer onto the floor. Everything is melting. Why oh why do these appliances pick the worst times to act up. Are they psychic. Anyway Mr C and I cleaned up the mess. Wiped up the water, Threw away stuff and transferred the rest downstairs to the small extra fridge in the basement.
I have been reading a book, "Gilead", when anything bad happens one of the characters, a retired minister, says
"There must be a blessing in here somewhere"
I know, I know,,,I am getting well, I have Mr C to help me. We have the extra refrigerator and and ???
I have all of you to listen to me vent.
Thanks :)
Sons of the Pioneers- Roy Rogers
Cool Water
by Bob Nolan (Revised lyrics by Joni Mitchell)
All day I face the barren waste
Without a taste of water
Cool water
Old Dan and I
Our throats slate dry
Our spirits cry out for water
Cool clear water
Keep on movin' Dan
Some devils had a plan
Buried poison in the sand
Don't drink it man
It's in the water
Cool clear water
In my mind I see
A big green tree
And a river flowin' free
Waitin' up ahead
For you and me
Cool clear water
The nights are cool and I'm a fool
Each star is a pool of water
Cool water
But come the dawn
We carry on
We won't last long without water
Cool clear water
Keep on movin' Dan
We're still in no-man's land
Dry bones and sand
People never planned here for water
Cool clear water
In my mind I see
A big green tree
And a river flowin' free
Waiting up ahead for you and me
Cool clear water
The shadows sway
They seem to say
Tonight we pray for water
Cool water
And way up there
If you care
Please show us where
There's good water
Cool clear water.
OK, Now I am feeling well enough to tell you all how sick I have been.
Last Saturday at this time I would have given "my kingdom" for a drink of cool clear water. I was parched and dehydrated. Could not swallow even a sip of water without terrible pain; and I have a high pain thresh hold but with the awful sore throat I came down with on Friday, swallowing anything was out of the picture.(even my saliva)
I called my doctor late Friday afternoon and he sent me an antibiotic, large pill, which I had to force myself to swallow regardless of the severe pain. By Monday I was no better. Mr C took me in to the doctor who said my throat looked like a bad burn. That is exactly how it felt. He diagnosed bronchitis and severely inflamed throat and the nurse proceed to give me a shot in each hip to speed up healing process. He also prescribed a liquid throat anesthetizing medicine.
So I now can swallow, and eat light stuff like scrambled eggs and Gatorade and ginger ale.
But it is mainly the cool clear water that I appreciate the most. Most times with a little crushed ice in the water. The crushed ice comes from the water/ice dispenser on refrigerator door. Ahhh
So last night I have had a pleasant restful evening. I go upstairs and get ready for bed. I go back down to the kitchen for water and --------
WHAMO !!!
The &&%###&& refrigerator has chosen this night to go off. The water is leaking out of the freezer onto the floor. Everything is melting. Why oh why do these appliances pick the worst times to act up. Are they psychic. Anyway Mr C and I cleaned up the mess. Wiped up the water, Threw away stuff and transferred the rest downstairs to the small extra fridge in the basement.
I have been reading a book, "Gilead", when anything bad happens one of the characters, a retired minister, says
"There must be a blessing in here somewhere"
I know, I know,,,I am getting well, I have Mr C to help me. We have the extra refrigerator and and ???
I have all of you to listen to me vent.
Thanks :)
Words Women Use
Equal time with a post about WOMEN
Words Women Use
FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use fine to describe how a woman looks this will cause you to have one of those arguments.
FIVE MINUTES
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so its an even trade.
NOTHING
This means something, and you should be on your toes. Nothing is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. Nothing usually signifies an
argument that will last Five Minutes and end with Fine.
GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows)
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over Nothing and will end with the word Fine.
GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows)
This means I give up or do what you want because I dont care You will get a Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead in just a few minutes, followed by Nothing and Fine and she will talk to you in about Five Minutes when she cools off.
LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A Loud Sigh means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over Nothing.
SOFT SIGH
Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. Soft Sighs mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.
THATS OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. Thats Okay means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. Thats Okay is often used with the word Fine and in conjunction with a Raised Eyebrow.
GO AHEAD.
At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.
PLEASE DO
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful
and you shouldnt get a Thats Okay.
THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say youre welcome.
THANKS A LOT
This is much different from Thanks. A woman will say, Thanks A Lot when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the Loud Sigh. Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the Loud Sigh, as she will only tell you Nothing.
author unknown
Words Women Use
FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use fine to describe how a woman looks this will cause you to have one of those arguments.
FIVE MINUTES
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so its an even trade.
NOTHING
This means something, and you should be on your toes. Nothing is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. Nothing usually signifies an
argument that will last Five Minutes and end with Fine.
GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows)
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over Nothing and will end with the word Fine.
GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows)
This means I give up or do what you want because I dont care You will get a Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead in just a few minutes, followed by Nothing and Fine and she will talk to you in about Five Minutes when she cools off.
LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A Loud Sigh means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over Nothing.
SOFT SIGH
Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. Soft Sighs mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.
THATS OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. Thats Okay means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. Thats Okay is often used with the word Fine and in conjunction with a Raised Eyebrow.
GO AHEAD.
At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.
PLEASE DO
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful
and you shouldnt get a Thats Okay.
THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say youre welcome.
THANKS A LOT
This is much different from Thanks. A woman will say, Thanks A Lot when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the Loud Sigh. Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the Loud Sigh, as she will only tell you Nothing.
author unknown
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Men are just happier people
Here is a chuckle for you:
Men Are Just Happier People--
What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet, one pair of shoes and one belt; one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 23 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
>
Men Are Just Happier People--
What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet, one pair of shoes and one belt; one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 23 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
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